Back home for good

Well, I moved back home about 2 months ago, and yes, it has taken me that long to post an update. I don't even know if anyone reads this anyways...except for you Amber... =)

We are renting a house in town, bought a used car, and started my new job. I am purposely not including the name of my hospital because I plan to continue writing about work on this blog and doing so would violate HIPAA (patient privacy) laws that I am bound to as a health care worker. So please do not mention it on this blog if you know.

Yesterday was a crazy day in the unit. The day shift nurses came on and it had been less than 15 minutes before we were doing running a code and doing chest compressions on a kid that had come up from CT. I think that was the first time I had actually seen a full, blown-out code. The air was so tense as the nurses and the the team stayed calm giving meds, doing compressions, and other interventions. It was not on my patient, so I helped by calling pharmacy, being a runner, and stayed with the patient's mom. We had let the parents in to let them watch us run the code (this is often done when it's towards the end - so the family can see that eveything is being done for their child). This mom was obviously in shock and I just kept my hand on her shoulders and back to let her know I was there. By the time we came in, the night shift had been coding the kid on and off for about 4 hours - and it went on for about another 45 minutes before the docs "called it"(let go/stop compressions/stop the code).

We had to get ourselves together and take care of the other kids. The unit was very tearful, and tense, as everyone could hear the sobbing of a mother who had just lost her child. It echoed throughout the unit for hours.

This is the second death that I have seen in the unit in less than 2 months. The other kid died a few weeks ago. He was on ECMO for heart failure, and his parents decided it was time to do discontinue care. I helped with his postmortem care, and somehow it helped me to deal with my dad's death. I was able to be there for this child right after he died, something I was not able to do for my dad as I was still in California.

Another two deaths - James B. (former KUC youth pastor/missionary) was killed in a hit-and-run car accident earlier this month in San Jose, CA. We had visited with James, his wife Brenda, and their kids last years in LA county. Also, my uncle's brother (Uncle Bill) died in his home last month from stomach cancer. I did not know Uncle Bill, but remembered that he was very kind to me and Nori during our elementary school days.

I have a heavy heart, but am refreshed that God has all things in control even though it does not seem like it to me. It's good to be home with family and friends. James comes home at the end of this month.